Sometimes I just want to cry: Boobie Burglary
Police are interested in anyone who may have recently increased their cup size after a pair of implants was stolen
Police responded to an unusual theft at a hospital in Grindsted, mid-Jutland, recently, after it was reported that a pair of silicone breasts had been stolen from an operating theatre, according to public broadcaster DR.
The hooter heist occurred sometime between Thursday 4 June and last Monday. No information has been released about the size of the stolen implants, so it is not known what cup size police are looking for.
However, police in Billund are eager to speak with anyone who may know something about the theft or who have seen the unusual haul.
You know, stealing a pair of implants won’t increase anyone’s cup size. They’re implants, they need to be IMPLANTED first. Surgically, that is.
Boobie burglary, hooter heist. That’s real mature reporting, fellas. Also, implants don’t come in cup-sizes, you dolts, they come in milli-litres. You can’t tell an implant’s cupsize as an implant that’d give a petite woman F-cup breasts might give a larger woman C-cup breasts. Police won’t be looking for a cup size, they’ll be looking for two more or less shapeless silicone waterbaloons, not a pair of tits. There’s a difference.
Women’s ideal looks are by now so artificial that the artificial means of acquiring said looks are described just as if they were the real thing.
ARGH!
Filed under: Media, Pornification, Portrayal of Women, Sexism
